Get As Much Sleep As Possible
If parenting is a big balloon of joy, exhaustion is the pin that pops it! Your sleep success can make or break a mood. After 30 years in pediatric practice, I have seen over and over again how sleep deprivation can reduce a mom or dad to tears. It makes you feel alone, incompetent, edgy and causes serious accidents and sickness. The 5 Ss are a simple tool to help boost baby sleepand so is SNOO, our smart sleeper the safest, most effective baby bed ever made!
Dont Freak Out When The Baby Cries
If you didnt already know this, babies cry. Thats a way that they communicate. Dont freak out when the little one starts to whimper in your arms and immediately give the baby to mom. She has to soothe her baby all day and night, so be helpful and calm the baby yourself. If baby is still fussy after your attempts, then hand the baby over to mom. New mothers want to see you confident while being around and holding their baby, so freaking out makes them freak out. Stay calm.
A Newborn Routine That Works Every Time
Want stress free daily routines for your family? Get our daily routine cards for littles here!
If youve been going around a tired mom like a chicken with your head cut off, heres a good sample newborn routine for you. I think itll go a long way in helping you survive the newborn phase.
Id like to start off by saying that I feed my baby when he is hungry. I love routine and think theyre great, and we work towards a routine each day.
But even if its off schedule, I feed my babies when they are hungry. In case you are a troll. Or a routine hater. Or about to send me hate mail.
I just wanted to tell you.
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Start Out How You Can Hold Out
My grandmother has always given me wise advice. One of the first things she told me after I had my firstborn was to start out how you can hold out. Simply put, dont start doing things you arent willing to keep doing.
Now, obviously there are things you do with a newborn you dont do with a 1 year old. Or conversely, start habits early that youd like to continue.
If you nurse, you may want to know how to get a breastfed baby to take a bottle so you can have some breaks here and there.
However, if you find yourself doing elaborate things to get the baby to settle or you are running around in circles to do simple things, its time to step back and weigh, test, and measure.
In the sleepless newborn fog its easy to do things that dont make sense.
Read: Start Out How You Can Hold Out
How To Be A Good Mother
Mothers-in-law have been the butt of millions of jokes. In fact, stereotypes dating back as far as 50 years portray the mother-in-law as the most problematic relationship in the family. Yet, it’s no joke when it comes to being a good mother-in-law. This role is not only challenging but requires considerable effort.
Being a good mother-in-law is one of the most important roles in healthy family dynamics. In order to someday be a good grandmother, you should first study how to be a good mother-in-law, as this relationship can set the tone for your role as grandmother.
Additionally, if you focus on being a positive influence and acting accordingly, research shows that these attitudes and behaviors could end up being a self-fulfilling prophecy in many instances. In other words, people who believe their ties to their in-laws will be strong, will end up having strong ties.
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Now Onto The Absolute Best Advice For New Moms
Every single piece of advice should be approached with an element of flexibility. Even if you feel it resonates with you, if your course of action changes, be forgiving of yourself. Also, dont take advice just simply because its what you feel you should be doing.
Accept others help.
Its easy to get caught up in trying to be polite. However, if someone offers to bring over dinner, wash your floors, or fold your laundry, say yes. There is no prize for doing it all. Every extra little bit of help gives you extra energy, extra morale or just a needed break from being touched out.
Get some alone time.
Whether its going to the grocery store alone, driving to and from Starbucks or actually taking an hour or two to yourself, find a way to do it regularly. As cliche as it is to say, you cant pour from an empty cup. And youre not just doing this baby thing for the next few weeks. You have the next 18 years plus to be selfless most of the time. Take time for yourself.
Have a sense of humour, or at least be loving to yourself, in the face of your parenting fails.
We all have them. All of us. But they feel especially consequential when youre a new mom. Its easy to feel like each action defines your success in this new role. But this isnt remotely true.
No one knows your baby better than you.
Understand parents who parent differently than you are doing their best too.
Every situation is unique and so are each persons limitations.
Whether its good or bad, it isnt forever.
First Time Mom Quotes
Make something extra special for the new mom in your life by pairing one of the following first time mom quotes with a shadow box that she can keep mementos in.
- The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new. Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh
- Birthing is the most profound initiation to spirituality a woman can have. Robin Lim
- Whether your pregnancy was meticulously planned, medically coaxed, or happened by surprise, one thing is certain your life will never be the same. Catherine Jones
- Just as there is no warning for childbirth, there is no preparation for the sight of a first child. There should be a song for women to sing at this moment, or a prayer to recite. But perhaps there is none because there are no words strong enough to name that moment. Anita Diamant
- I believe the choice to become a mother is the choice to become one of the greatest spiritual teachers there is. Oprah
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Finding Ways To Calm Yourself In Stressful Times
Since babies cant communicate verbally, they are especially attuned to signs of anxiety or stress. Babies need outside help to calm down. But an anxious caregiver can actually add to the babys stress, making them harder to soothe. When you are feeling stressed, try to find ways to calm down before you interact with your baby.
Take a deep breath. This may mean letting your baby cry a minute longer so that you can take a deep breath before picking your baby up and trying to soothe them.
Team up. Dont think you have to do it all yourself. Try to enlist the help of your spouse, friends, family members, or a babysitter to help hold or care for your baby during fussy times of the day.
Take a walk. Fresh air and a change of scenery can work wonders for you and your baby. During particularly stressful times, try making a change in environment and see if it helps you and your baby calm down.
The Basic Qualities Of A Newborn Mother
Those would be:
- Organizational skills
- Ability to exert control from chaos
OK, so thats a slightly depressing list. We havent gotten to anything about caring or compassion yet. At the same time, this list is largely accurate.
Heres the flip side: motherhood is a job. Its certainly a bigger deal than any marketing manager role you might have at the same time as youre a mother. What makes motherhood a job, aside from the basic responsibilities, is that the tasks shift all the time.
Look at these bullets above. If you apply those bullets to your daughter when shes 15, the reaction is very different she might push away then applying those attributes when she was a newborn.
So remember that always: no one does this perfectly, and the role always shifts.
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Secure Attachment Starts With Taking Care Of Yourself
Babies communicate most effectively when they are in a quiet and alert state, and so do you. As hard as it may be, it is important to take care of yourself in order to build a secure attachment bond with your infant.
Try to get enough sleep.Sleep deprivation can make you cranky, listless, and irritable. Some parents have found it helpful to trade night duty , or to take at least one morning a week to sleep late.
Ask for support around the house. Especially in the newborn stages, get as much help as you can from your spouse, family, or friends.
Schedule some time away. Caring for a young infant is demanding, and taking some time away can help you parent more effectively. An hour in a coffee shop, a walk, a yoga class, or doing something you want to do can provide some perspective and renewed energy.
Mommy To Be Quotes And Sayings
The following mommy to be quotes and sayings are perfect additions to birth announcements or messages for a baby book.
- A mother is always the beginning. She is how things begin. Amy Tan
- There is such a special sweetness in being able to participate in creation. Pamela S. Nadav
- You never understand life until it grows inside of you. Sandra C. Kassis
- Having kidsthe responsibility of rearing good, kind, ethical, responsible human beingsis the biggest job anyone can embark on. Maria Shriver
- The natural state of motherhood is unselfishness. When you become a mother, you are no longer the center of your own universe. You relinquish that position to your children. Jessica Lange
- A mother continues to labor long after the baby is born. Lisa Jo Baker
- No influence is so powerful as that of the mother. Sarah Josepha Hale
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Out And About With Baby
26. Enlist backup. Make your first journey to a big, public place with a veteran parent. “Having my sister with me for support kept me from becoming flustered the first time I went shopping with my newborn,” says Suzanne Zook, a mom in Denver.
27. If you’re on your own,“stick to places likely to welcome a baby, such as story hour at a library or bookstore,” suggests Christin Gauss, a mom in Fishers, Indiana.
28. “Keep your diaper bag packed,” says Fran Bowen, a mom in Brooklyn. There’s nothing worse than finally getting the baby ready, only to find that you’re not.
29. Stash a spare. Holland Brown, a mom in Long Beach, California, always keeps a change of adult clothes in her diaper bag. “You don’t want to get stuck walking around with an adorable baby but mustard-colored poop all over you.”
30. Finally, embrace the chaos. “Keep your plans simple and be prepared to abandon them at any time,” says Margi Weeks, a mom in Tarrytown, New York.
If nothing else, remember that everyone makes it through, and so will you. Soon enough you’ll be rewarded with your baby’s first smile, and that will help make up for all the initial craziness.
Heather Swain is a mother and writer in Brooklyn, New York. Her novel is Luscious Lemon.
Be Open To Your Child’s Feedback
Children communicate many things through behavior as well as words. Listen to your child when they have something to say, focus your attention on them. You may not agree with their feedback, but giving your child the time and space to hear their thoughts goes a long way in their development and self-confidence.
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Creating Your Own Schedule For A Toddler And Baby
Hopefully, the above sample stay-at-home mom schedule for toddler and baby gave you some ideas about how you can create a daily schedule and routine that works for your family.
When it come to creating your ideal routines, youll want to build out your daily schedule by planning the following activities :
- Sleep times
- Cleaning schedule
- Meal Prep
While this season of life isnt easy, it sure is full of wonderful slobbery kisses and the most delicious cuddles you could imagine. Grab your free printable daily schedules for a toddler and a baby and create your perfect schedule.
Youve got this, mama!
Don’t Be Afraid To Ignore Advice
“Everyone will give you advice, solicited or not when you are about to have a baby or have a newborn,” according to Kelly and Perren. “Its extremely valuable to listen to the experience and perspectives of others, as it can help you form your own opinions, but make sure that you know that what is right for some families may not be right for yours. Let your motherly instinct kick-in and listen to it instead,” they say.
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Realize That You’re A Mom For Life
In the span of a lifetime, your child will have many relationships. Being a mother to your child is by far one of the most, if not the most, impactful relationship. Understand that mothering a child is a lifelong commitment to nurturing, teaching, caring for, guiding, loving and supporting another person’s growth through the lifespan.
Let Your Toddler Help
Keep your toddler busy and help them feel a part of caring for their new sibling by enlisting them as your special helperyou may even get some actual help out of the deal. While a toddler can’t take on complicated or direct baby care tasks unsupervised, they can accomplish many small jobs.
For example, ask your toddler to grab a diaper, rattle, or burp cloth for your babyor to get you an apple or granola bar. They could have them sing a song or do a dance to entertain the baby. You can have them help you pick the baby’s next outfit or help you softly pat them dry after a bath. Including your toddler in these tasks helps them feel useful and competent, teaches them new skills, and keeps them by your side.
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